i'm actually in school right now, creative writing to be exact. that's why i'm allowed to blog. it's kind of funny, if i wasnt in class right now, i dont think i would have blogged in a long time, but it's also because of this class that i haven't blogged. i get most of my emotional shit out on a journal we keep for the class. a hand written journal. something i havent used in a while. maybe since africa. yeah, since africa. i dont really feel the need to tell people about my life anymore. i think i thought if i wrote myself down and posted it outloud for people to see, then i would be more understood. or maybe i thought people would care, or read, or maybe enjoy. i think that's why i wrote blogs. however, i think the same people listened to me that would have listened to me even if i didnt have a blog.

when i write i'm feeling something. but it's normally not a good feeling. sometimes i write out of happiness. but most of the time i don't. i wanted to write because i was sad. i wanted to be happy. i'm happier now.

i guess i needed an audience for the slaughter.