hello

today i discovered something important.

i figured out i am a wonderful complex beautiful creature. i'm an intricate design in the artwork of life and a dancing bird of paradise in a gloomy grey world. i’m the light at the end of the tunnels and I’m the bumble bees and the butterflies in flower beds of yellow and blue. I’m brighter then the sun and I’m the holes in the dark paper that allows the stars to shine in the night sky. I’m the piano in the empty stage with noises that fill the air and I’m the dust dancing in the musty lights. I’m growing older but I’m not growing up. I’m not afraid of the world; I’m in love with it. I’m the magic that makes fireflies glow and I’m the summer heat that warms them! I’m the grass we lay on and the sky we make pictures with. I’m the ocean we swim in and the jellyfish who dance endlessly. I’m the butterflies in your stomach and the lump in your throat. I’m where the wild things are, I’m the catcher in the rye. I’m enchanted and delightful. Vibrant and glowing. I’m deep purple and bright yellow. Turquoise and lime green.

I’m not giving up. No I’m not letting go. I’m allowing. I’m freeing. I’m taking this away and I’m giving it back to me. I’m not dwelling, I’m enabling. I’m not unloving, I’m loving myself. I’m not closing doors, I’m opening the windows. I’m not missing out, I’m giving myself back all the things I deserve. I’m not taking the easy way out, I’m falling in love with myself again and doing all the things you wouldn’t let me. I’m dreaming with a broken heart. I’m allowing myself to have a simple, happy, beautiful morning. And I’m seeing it all the way I was born to be. Without you. Thank you for reminding me. This is the last time I’m thanking you. This is the last time your reminding me too.

I’m believing the best is yet to come.