your sleepy songs

ive never been a sleeper
i sleep. but never as long as i should.
hardly tired, barely sleeping.
never bothered me.

we knew it'd be worse overseas.
time changes. airplanes.
you gave me your lullabies.
i guess you were worried.
"you'd have go be crazy to stay awake through this"

this little mix of slow harmonious melodies has yet to put me to sleep.
or anything near.
if anything, it keeps me up at night.

it's turned into an emotional alarm clock rather then a soothing goodnight.

the words bring me back to a time were things were easy, and the world was warm. but when i wake up from the dream, it sets off a frenzy of feelings I haven't felt since. and I plunge further then before.

it's not disappointing. I guess it's more expected.

still tonight i hit play, hoping, wishing, waiting to fall asleep. maybe ill ease my way into it, low volumes at first.

or maybe this will be a permanent reminder that for whatever the reason, I cannot put this to sleep.

"what's so simple in the moonlight by the morning never is"